I’ve been in Harpenden, England now for a little over six weeks, and what a six weeks it has been.
As a group we have dealt with COVID; lived in multiple quarantines; learned about evangelism, Jesus as a person, the nature and character of God, and perceiving God’s voice. We have also gone out into neighboring communities every Friday for times of prayer and outreach. A highlight has been sharing the love of Christ through each of our individual passions and skills, and in fact, we just got back from a week long mid-term outreach in Nottingham and Coventry, England where we were able to lean into our creativity and talents. During this week, we served in practical and spiritual ways, and while exhausting, it was also a time that was incredibly rewarding. God is so good, and there are so many stories from just those seven days in Nottingham, but I want to focus on the six weeks as a whole.
Time of learning and evangelism as a group has been amazing, but I have also worked through a LOT personally, and there is still so much to come. I could write about a lot, and there are things I will probably get around to writing about eventually, but I just want to chat about a few highlights.
1. Community
I just have to brag a little about the group I am living with. It is incredible how a team so focused on Christ can live together in community like we are, and it be such a life giving experience. It’s all God’s grace for sure.
Coming into this time, I worried that I wouldn’t fit in, or that I would struggle to form meaningful relationships, but I have been so blessed by a good and healthy community, as well as a few very close sweet friends. I've even been able to catch up with some older friends who happened to be coming through Harpenden.
Ultimately, we are learning about relationship with Christ, but one of the amazing ways we can experience and see the kind of relationship Christ wants with us is leaning into the relationships we have around us. It’s been a huge blessing for me to have people to laugh, cry, and learn with in this season. Thank you for everyone who was and has been praying for this.
2. Seeing God provide
God has really provided in a few ways - relationally and financially. A lot of these last few months have been leaning on God and trusting that He is guiding me where He wants me. A lot easier said than done, as I have been kicking and crying through a lot of it.
Finances and future are always high on the prayer list, but time and time again God has provided in amazing ways. I am even seeing Him lay foundations for sustaining me in the future which is really exciting!
Trust isn’t always easy. Giving up control has also never been high on my to-do list, but as I have been learning more and more about the nature and character of God, it gets that much easier to loosen the reins just a bit.
3. Gaining a greater understanding of evangelism
I came into YWAM with a very skeptical look at evangelism. I always thought of those people yelling on the streets, people holding signs saying “You’re going to hell,” or the people wanting to tell you about Christ in order to immediately convert you. I know I tend to cross the street or walk with purpose when I see these individuals.
So, you might be wondering why I chose to do a school focused on evangelism and sharing the Gospel. Honestly, I was hoping to avoid the parts about talking about God with strangers, and thought I could just slip into the background and serve and support while others did this. As you can imagine that has not been the case.
One of our lecture weeks focused specifically on evangelism, and it honestly radically changed how I view evangelism and how I see myself in it.
We watched a short video clip one of the days. It had an atheist talking about being evangelized to. He said he wasn’t mad about it, and understood why the man wanted to tell him about Jesus. The line that really stuck out was this: “If you truly believe there is a God that saves you from Hell and gives you eternal life, how much do you have to hate someone to not tell them about Him?”
This hit home. How much do I have to hate someone to not tell them about salvation? This changes everything. If I am commanded to love others like Christ loves, then how can I not get past the fear of an awkward conversation or a possibly weird interaction in order to possibly bring someone into the arms of the Father? There aren’t a lot of good answers to this.
To be clear, I’m not about to go out onto the street and start yelling at people, but it does mean that I’m going to wake up and go about my day with a particular intentionality. And honestly, I don’t think this is that radical.
Christ calls us to live like Him, to become more like Him in how we act, live, and speak. If we believe He is real, we believe He wants relationship with us, then as we pursue Him our lives should change. How we walk, talk, and interact with the world should change. Our lives, in every shape and form, become evangelism.
I think I’ve found it weird or awkward to bring up Christ in daily life before, but if I truly believe everything I say I believe, I’m not really sure I can justify keeping that in. I don’t think I hate anyone that much.
4. Hearing God’s voice
This is probably something I’ll go into in another post, but it has been a huge part of my time here. In my Christian walk the idea of actually hearing God’s voice through the Holy Spirit talking to me was a bit unheard of. I can’t say that I really ever remember being taught about this in such detail, but as it turns out, it has been one of the most instrumental parts of my walk with Christ. Taking time to stop and ask for guidance and be open to actually hearing an answer seems pretty simple, but in the past prayer has always been a reaction, and I’m learning to focus on it being a relationship.
There is such an emphasis here to talk and listen to God in every aspect of everything we do. Practically speaking, I’m learning that there is familiarity in hearing God’s voice. As I spend more time with Him in morning quiet times, worship, and even in daily tasks, it is getting easier to perceive His voice and guidance.
At the same time, I think hearing from God is something I also feel a lot of pressure to do. It is a very welcoming and no-judgement environment, but there is this unspoken pressure when everyone else is hearing from God, and maybe I’m not sure if I am or I’m just not at all. I’ve struggled with that some, but again, spending time in the Word and with Christ has been the defining factor of this growth.
There is and always will be room for growth, but for now, I’m really enjoying my morning routine of getting ready for the day with God.
There are a lot of other things I have been learning or have been stretched in recently, but some are either too personal, God and I are right in the middle of dissecting, or it should be its own post. Regardless, this time in England has been such a God send, and I am so thankful for the prayers and support I have coming from home and elsewhere.
For those praying, please keep a few of these requests in mind:
Our school of twenty has, as of yesterday (AHH!), been split into two teams and will go to two different outreach locations come April. A lot of prayer and thought by the staff and all of us in DTS has been put into how our school has been divided. Please be praying for peace in the decisions regarding who is going where, and for team cohesion as we prepare to leave in the next six weeks.
I personally have a lot of decisions I need to make in the coming weeks regarding my future, and would appreciate a lot of prayer that, while important decisions need to be made, I am able to have peace about it and focus on where I am at right now. I really feel like God will make my next steps clear.
Health. The last month and a half have been really low points in my health. I have suffered from chronic back and joint problems for quite some time, and normally the pain is manageable and/or at bay. These flare ups can be very distracting and consuming, so I am just continuing to pray for complete healing and more mobility to do everything I am wanting to.
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